Posts tagged ‘Transitioning’

Embrace it!!

Tressumé: Anita

Name: Anita

Location: Baltimore, Maryland

I found this young lady on Instagram and she has been a fellow Instagrammer for quite some time. Time and time again I see her post pictures of her amazing transition. If I were a longer term transitioner I’d definitely have to go to her for tips. All of her transition styles come out super! Check out her Tressumé.

How long have you been natural?
I am not fully natural at this time.

Did you transition or do the Big Chop?
I am a transitioner.
Why did you choose that route?
I chose to transition for two reason… I believe I do not look good with short hair. Had it once (not on purpose…scissor happy stylist) and vowed never again.  Second reason, my husband had one request as he got used to my new hair.  Do not cut off all of your hair, is what he requested.How long have you been transitioning?I have been transitioning now for 12 months (August 2011 last relaxer).  I plan to transition anywhere between 18 months and 24 months.

What inspired you to have natural hair?
I have had a relaxer in my hair since I was 6 years old.  My mom doesn’t need a relaxer and did not know what to do with all of this thick kinky hair.  I have never seen my natural hair and became curious after seeing so many beautiful naturals.  Even though my relaxed hair grew long it always seemed to stop growing at a certain point and I experienced thinning at the temples.  I also have a very sensitive scalp and the relaxer gave me severe burns and I couldn’t take it anymore.

What has kept you motivated to remain natural?
As my new curls started coming in at first I began feeling like I needed to do something with this thick hair, but after learning so much about how to take care of it and what products to use it became something I began to get excited about.  The longer it got the more I wanted to try new transitioning styles to see what I could do with it next.  I can’t keep one style in (braids) too long because I begin to miss my curls.

What are two(2) natural hair products that you just can’t live without? Why?
This is really hard to come up with only two because I have become a product junkie.  If I had to go with any two, it would be Shea butter mixture (Shea butter, jojoba oil, coconut oil, & vitamin E oil) and Kinky Curly Knot Today.

What is your favorite way to wear your hair?
My favorite hair style is two strand twist out with perm rods on the relaxed ends.  This style is great to work out with and if when it gets old it’s great to pull up into a curly puff.  It really blends the two textures.
What do you love about your natural hair?Since I am not fully natural, I have to say I love the thickness of my hair and my curls.  I love when it’s wet and just fingering through to look at how I have different textures throughout.

What do you dislike about it?
Currently, I can’t say I dislike anything about it.  I can say however, I dislike the relaxed ends that I just can’t part with at the moment.

What tip(s) would you recommend to someone who wants to become natural, is transitioning, or needs advice about natural hair?
Patience, patience, patience.  This is a process.  Even through the transition you will still be figuring things out about your hair.  The more it grows the chances are you may have to change things up a bit.  Try not to fall into the product junkieism (as I have)!! There are so many things to try, so stick with what you know works until it doesn’t work anymore.  Most of all don’t give up to fall into hair typing and when you find out yours isn’t want you expect, be happy with what you have and learn how to take care of it.  There will be those who do not like it and that’s ok, you are doing it for you and not everyone else’s approval.

Follow me on Instagram:  Nita67
Youtube Channel: aljohnson19 (sorry no fancy name☺) – I didn’t know that channel would evolve into anything when I signed up.

Do’s and Don’ts of Transitioning to Natural Hair

Yes and NoDO…

Eliminate direct heat like flat irons, blow dryers, etc. as much as possible. Use hooded dryers on a medium setting (or lower) for as little time possible.

I stopped using direct heat 2 months into my transition.


Learn to embrace your texture. It’s easy to get caught up in someone else’s head, but chances are your hair isn’t like theirs. So don’t waste your time wishing you had someone else’s crown. It will leave you disappointed and exhausted. Love what God gave you.


Deep condition weekly with moisturizing conditioners. This will help strengthen and soften your new growth, relaxed hair and prevent breakage.

A lot of new transitioners complain about coarse and unmanageable new growth. Let me tell you that deep conditioning is key to dealing with this. After doing this consistently for 6-8 weeks (I use Organics Olive Oil Replenisher), I noticed a changed in my hair’s manageability and texture.

This is especially important if you’ve used a lot of direct heat (flat irons, blow dryers) on your hair. Even a minimal amount of heat damage can make your hair texture feel worse than it truly is.

And unless you carefully moisturize your new growth before flat ironing (and most people don’t) you probably have some heat damage. This can be misleading and it makes you think your hair is more coarse than it is. Your hair is probably just fried and starving for moisture.


Wear a lot of protective styles. Rod sets, twist outs, braid outs, flat twists, buns, braids/extensions (not too tight), straw sets, etc. should become your go-to styles. See my posts on styling transitioning hair.


Limit combing, pulling (tight ponytails) and manipulation. The above hairstyles do not require combing. The only time you should comb your hair is when you detangle on wash day.

Use sulfate-free shampoos. Sulfates strip your hair of its natural oils. Natural hair can be dry enough, you don’t need help from sulfates. The Giovanni line is my fave.


Trim your ends every 4-6 weeks. If you have split ends, they will travel up to your natural hair and cause breakage.


Make assumptions about your hair texture too early. It will likely change as you continue to transition. In my 2nd month of transitioning, my new growth felt dry, coarse and brittle.

My hair follicles were extremely damaged, so even after I stopped relaxing I was still growing scab hair. At first, I thought this was my hair’s texture, but it wasn’t. This is the very reason many people stop transitioning.

But as I continued to deep condition weekly and lay off the direct heat, my hair softened up. I started seeing curl definition and my hair began retaining moisture better.

So don’t be fooled by your new growth’s texture while you are relaxing and when you start transitioning. You may be going through the scab hair period.

The good news is, most people stop growing scab hair 3-6 months after starting their transition.


Listen to ignorant peers, friends and family. Why should there be anything wrong with wanting to wear your hair the way you came into this world?

Unfortunately kinky hair is often seen as the ugliest/worst kind of hair to have, but that’s only because we are comparing it to the majority, which is straight, Euro-centric hair.

If everyone had kinky hair there would be no class system of hair and comparisons. We have been brainwashed to believe straighter hair is more beautiful because that’s what society feeds us (through magazines, TV, etc.)

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. As long as you feel your hair is beautiful, why should anyone else’s opinion matter? Trust me, it may take some time to get to this level, but it will happen eventually.


Coat your hair with too many products. As your hair grows out, you may feel the need to “fix it” by using multiple products. Product overload can suffocate your strands, cause breakage and make your hair appear dull.

Your hair does not need to be “fixed.” Learn to embrace whatever grows out of your head. A light moisturizer 3-5 times a week should be enough for most people. You can seal in the moisture with a natural oil like olive, castor, coconut, jojoba, sweet almond, etc.


Become a product junky. This is sort of like the pot calling the kettle here. I’m a self-proclaimed product junky. I have been for many years, even when I was relaxing.

It got worse when I started transitioning because I was obsessed with trying to achieve someone else’s hair by using the products they use. I talk about this very issue in this video.

The only products you need are a good shampoo, conditioner (leave-in and rinse out) and a few daily moisturizers (preferably natural oils.) See my favorite transitioning product page.


Get caught up in rules and judgments. There are a lot of naturals who have definitions of what wearing natural hair means. Some become anti weave, anti colored contacts, anti straight hair, and anything that is not “natural.”

Remember, this is your journey. Find out what being natural means to you. Don’t let other’s opinions shape your actions and beliefs about what you have to do and cannot do because you wear natural hair. Also be careful of criticizing others just because they don’t share your journey or opinions.

I think it’s great when going natural inspires people to live healthier lives. But it’s not cool when that turns into judging others for their choices and opinions.


Expect acceptance from everyone. Let’s just keep it real for a minute. A lot of people don’t like and will never like natural hair. Period. End of story. There’s nothing you can do to make everyone approve of your choice.

But your real friends and people who genuinely love and support you will respect your decision, even if they don’t embrace your choice of hairstyle.

Naysayers of natural hair are everywhere, but at some point you have to live life for yourself and not for other people’s acceptance.


Until next time….


Transitioning to Natural Hair: 101

***I am fully natural now…but decided to venture back to my transitioning days to inspire those that are currently struggling with transitioning to natural hair**

More and more women are going natural these days. There are several reasons that women decide to stop relaxing their hair. Some are:
1. The relaxers are damaging their hair
2. The women are curious as to how much longer and thicker her hair will be in her natural state.
3. The women are curious as to what their natural texture is like.
4. The women are going natural to encourage their daughters that being natural is beautiful.
5. The women are just looking for a different look.
6. Some are going natural just because it is the “In” thing right now.

No matter what your reason for doing it, there is one thing we can call agree on. Transitioning is NOT easy. There are several ways to transition. You can have a short or lengthy transition. You can have a HARD transition or a not so hard transition. Your experience depends upon two things…YOU and what you make of it.

I have personally transitioned twice. The first time I transitioned I was living in Los Angeles and just about everyone in the city is relaxer free. Therefore it was very easy to find a stylist for my transitioning hair. During this transition, I went to the salon every two weeks for a wash, condition and press. I wore my hair out 99% of the time and it was painless. The ONLY reason I relaxed again…was because I moved back to the land of humidity…MEMPHIS. During this time, I was reluctant to wear textured styles. I only transitioned because a relaxer and color had eaten up my hair and left it thin, brittle and short. After 7 months of transitioning I had hair beyond shoulder length that was thick and full of body.

My second transition was MUCH different. I discovered the internet hair boards back in 2001 and I have learned SO much since then. I have had thick and healthy relaxed hair and thick and healthy texturized hair. I am aware that I can have both chemicals and healthy hair. However, I still feel as though my hair THRIVES when I don’t chemically alter it. So I decided to attempt to transition AGAIN and AGAIN and AGAIN only to fail. Here are some of the reasons that I was not successful:

1. Attempting to wear straight styles. When you get past a certain point, it is very hard to wear half relaxed and half natural hair straight. One issue you will face is how WEAK your hair is. You are going to have to put allot of stress on your hair to get that silky straight look and hair with 2 different textures (extremely different textures) is not very strong. When I was doing this, my hair would start to break at the point where the two textures met. Not a good look.

2. Not being focused on WHY I was transitioning. Anything that I do, I try to do it with purpose. If you do not have a purpose for doing something, it is very easy to get off task. I had to first figure out WHY I was doing what I was doing and remain focused on that so that I could be successful.

3. Poor product choice. I have mentioned here several times that I use different products when I wear different styles. My curly hair does not like the same products that my straight hair does. My natural hair does not like the same products that my relaxed hair did. As I transitioned, I continued to use the same methods and products as when I was natural. When I was transitioning, my hair was very dry. Moisture is VERY important in a healthy transition. I may have been more successful if I did my research and sought out products that worked well with my new texture of hair.

4. Fear. This is by far the biggest. For awhile I was seriously afraid that I would not be attractive with natural hair. All I could envision was “taco meat” lining my hair line. Not..cute. In my simple mind, natural hair was not beautiful. I had to learn to love me…and all of me. Whatever my texture is…GOD gave it to me. So I decided to find out WHAT I have…and nurture whatever that is. It also helped to browse beautiful natural images of women who have similar textures. It would do me NO good to go and view all these silky curls because that is not what I have. Who is to say that kinky hair isn’t beautiful? The more kinky albums I viewed, the more I realized that kinky hair is JUST as beautiful as the silky curls. To be honest, once I accepted this LARGE small little tidbit….transitioning became that much easier.

These are just a FEW of the issues I encountered and conquered while on my journey to natural hair. There are tons more…but I will stop here. You can rest assured that I will be back with more. 🙂


Until next time….


MyNaturalSistas: India’s Transition

Just a little reminder to keep on pushing with that transitioning. Take your time and research those styles to blend you hair. I have included a video from a known Vlogger to help keep you motivated.


Until next time….


Tressumé Chanell

Name: Chanell

Location: Bronx, New York

How long have you been natural?
For about 3 years now, I have been natural.

Did you transition or do the Big Chop?
I transitioned to natural hair.

Why did you choose that route?
I took a trip to Panama, and my aunt who is a hair dresser permed my hair, after that my hair literally started falling out.

How long did you transition?
I was not fully aware of how to actually go about doing a big chop. Therefore, I am not actually sure how long my full transition took place. I basically just kept clipping of my ends until it was all natural.

What inspired you to have natural hair?
The ability to have fuller hair, and the versatility of natural hair.

What has kept you motivated to remain natural?
I didn’t like how my hair looked on me when it was permed, so I don’t want to go back to that.

What are two(2) natural hair products that you just can’t live without? Why?
Carols Daughter Heat Protectant because it protects my hair from heat styling and does not leave my hair crunchy.
Hair Rules Ultra Moisturizing conditioner because it adds moisture to my hair making it easier to detangle.

What is your favorite way to wear your hair?
In a simple bun, nothing spectacular.

What do you love about your natural hair?
I love that every section of my has a different identity. The curls are different, so I have to treat it different.

What do you dislike about it?
When it’s humid outside and my hair gets really frizzy.

What tip(s) would you recommend to someone who wants to become natural, is transitioning, or needs advice about natural hair?
To research a lot; There is never a “correct” way of styling your natural hair. You have to actually research products and try them out on your own to see if they work for you. You must have the correct mindset.

I love, it helps me through my natural hair process.
Never give up, because their are more pros than cons of natural hair.

Have you ordered your Curlbox yet?

If you are a transitioner or a new natural, it may be hard trying to find the right products for your hair, without spending over hundreds of dollars a month. Well there is a solution!!!!


The beautiful Myleik Teele, behind a product called CurlBox , has created a system to deliver a box of a couple hair goodies to your door each month. How awesome is that!!

The cost of the CurlBox is $20 each month. You get the opportunity to try out new products or products not yet on the market. The best part about it is, your not spending hundreds of dollars to bring out your inner PJ(Product Junkie).

So head on over to and get your subscription now; Literally! CurlBox subscriptions go fast!

I ordered mine today!! I’m excited can’t wait to see what’s in store.

Until next time….


Transitioned Curl

When one first enters there journey, there thinking “how am I going to get this to look good?…I have straight and curly hair”. Don’t worry every transitioner has probably felt just like you; I know I did!

The biggest frustration is those two darn textures. You have to figure out how to make it blend(and I hope your not using those heat tools on your strands). In the beginning, I did use a flat iron with a protectant spray some days. After finding that your hair can get badly damaged from using heat, I immediately stopped torturing my beautiful natural strands.

Before deciding to go natural I often did what is called braid outs using water and a gel. These braids outs never lasted past a day. Finally, taking the step to transitioning I figured I have to find a way to get my hair to blend.

There are numerous styles that can help ensure the protection of your beautiful tresses as well as look cute.

Some of the styles are your:
• Braid out
• Twist out
• Bantu knots
• Bantu knot out
• Flexi rod set
• Straw set
• Wigs
• Weaves
• Extensions

I preferably want to go for the natural curly look and knew that I had experiences with braid outs. Some people might use the other techniques mentioned but, this is the route I have chosen mostly to achieve that look.

How I achieve this look


• put my hair into 4 sections
• wash my hair using only Shea Moisture black soap conditioner(sometimes I may even use their shampoo products)section by section.
• put my hair into four twists
• dry using an old t-shirt
• apply my Shea Moisture reconstructing mask which I mentioned before.
• apply coconut oil to seal my hair(focusing on my ends)

When all of that is finished, I braid my hair, sit under my bonnet dryer for about an hour, then cover my head with my trusty satin bonnet. The next day I unbraid and my curls are BEAUTIFUL! Using this method felt so good. My braid out finally lasted for a longer time, and looked great.

Do remember if you try this same method their is a possibility it may not work the same. You have to play around with your hair and find the best methods for you and your hair.

Until next time….


New Beginnings

Excited to begin this journey, and bring you all with me!!! Welcome!

Going natural is definitely a choice, especially when considering transitioning or actually going all out and doing the Big Chop. I personally decided to take the transition route (Check out my story in the About AphroditeKinks section). I fear short hair!! Before making that decision, I did my research.

You must first do your research, search online for other bloggers, sites, and YouTubers that are natural or transitioning. Is natural hair for you? Natural hair is for everyone, with much patience, tender, love, and care for your tresses; you can achieve natural hair.

One thing I can guarantee you will come across is negative feedback. In a society that has been conditioned that straight hair is “better”, or that some people have “good hair” , or “nappy hair”, negativity towards natural hair is booming. Healthy hair is good hair!! You will definitely come across people that in fact think these things are true; You may even believe those things are true. I am hear to tell you the are FALSE ! You have to stand strong and be proud of your natural kinks, coils, curls, and spirals!

Oh yes, and one last thing moisturize, moisturize, moisturize. Natural Hair should always be moisturized.

Until next time…..