Name: Denver

Me and Nana

As a mom or dad to a/or natural little(s), what do you think is your duty to teach them

about their hair?   That they should be who they are regardless of how they wear their

hair or regardless of how society feels about what’s acceptable or non acceptable.IMG_20120415_171526

What’s on the inner is far more precious than what’s on the outer, yet it’s beautiful to

express “yourself” on the inner and the outer.

 

If your child (ren) ever wanted to get a relaxer, would you allow them to? Why or why

not?

The thought has not even crossed my mind. I’ve had my hair relaxed from childhood up

until about 11 months ago. My mother decided that a relaxer made it easier for her to

handle my hair. After  abstaining from relaxing my hair I’ve learned how to maintain my

hair  without it.  I will teach my child how to do the same. If they get older and request a

relaxer I may allow it and maintain their relaxer myself just as I did for myself from the

age of 18-26. Being that our hair textures are the same they would only need a

relaxer about every 4 months so it would be limited to 2 relaxers a year.

How would you help them learn to appreciate the beauty of their natural hair?

I would do as I do now. I would forever tell my children and anyone else to embrace the

way that every part of you happens to be in it’s natural state, but if something really

bothers you then you should address it according to what will make “you” happy.

 

How old is/are your little(s)?

Denver is 5. (And I also have a 9 year old daughter and a 2 year old son).

How do they feel about their natural hair?

There’s a natural love for  their natural hair, and I try to do different things with it toIMG_20121202_202952

keep it that way. It can be overwhelming sometimes though. I cut my son’s hair  to have

one less head to braid.

 

Do you feel that you have impacted their beliefs about their hair? And why?

My daughters think that my hair is beautiful and have told me so on many occasions. If

they think that my hair is beautiful and their texture is very similar to mine then they’ll

think the same of their own hair as well. My baby girl smiles every time I finish combing

her hair, looks in the mirror and says, “My hair is beautiful”. I used to feel like, “The

straighter the better”, but I’ve been embracing the natural waves and curls and I love it!

 

What products do you typically use on their hair?

I pretty much make my own products, but to name some things I’ll say, grease, (Of

course!), shampoo with olive oil in it,  conditioner,  a blend of oils, ( Olive oil, Jojoba

Oil, etc.), pomade for edge control, hair pudding, sometimes a little spritz, and leave in

conditioner  or detangler. We have really thick hair and these products help me with

combing thru my daughter’s hair while eliminating  the tears.

 

What is their favorite way to wear their natural hair?

Right now it’s french braids with beads. Sometimes I press it out which stretches the

braids out longer. My son wears a cut that’s not so low so that you can still see theNanasHair

natural curl in his hair. Before cutting his hair I would either braid it to the back or put

pudding in his hair and curl strands of his hair around my finger. As it got thicker I

would use the pudding while braiding separate braids then take the braids loose and

let him wear the little curls all over his head. But there’s SO many cute ways to do your little’s natural hair.

 

How do you usually manage your little’s hair?

I like to rotate on a schedule for hair washing times. I don’t like having to wash more

than one head in the same week but sometimes I’m forced to. I have to do a spot wash

on my 2 year old son’s hair as he gets any food that he eats in his hair! I also like to do

multiple ponytails with 3strand braids sometimes. It’ll usually last 2-3 days if wrapped

at night.

 

What tips would you give to a mom or dad who needs help dealing with their little’s

natural hair?

I would say that it’s important to learn your little one’s hair  well. Learn what works

best in their hair. Test out different oils, butters, conditioners, etc. and find the best

natural mixture before jumping to put strong chemicals in your child’s hair. French

braids with beads is also a cute option that can take combing hair off of your hands

for at least 2 weeks. My mother took me to the salon at 10 to start getting relaxers in

my hair. It began to thin my hair out and my mother had to strip it out of my hair  andIMG_20120821_184955

treat it so that it could get it’s strength and length back. So there’s always a risk when

dealing with harsh chemicals. Especially on the little ones.

 

Comments:

We live in a world that focuses on the outer yet does not always embrace the outer in

it’s natural form and beauty. Kinky hair may take more time to manage but it is

beautiful if managed correctly. We were conditioned to think that other hair textures

from other races are what’s beautiful and in return rejected our natural beauty. Many

will describe our natural beauty as “Ugly”, “Nappy”, etc. which causes many of our

women of color to feel uncomfortable with their natural beauty. I don’t knock anyone

for  relaxing their hair and hate the hate that has grown between the “All-Natural”

women and the “Creamy Crack” using women. I’ve seen full arguments online about it.

I just wish for everyone to learn their hair, except who they are naturally, be

comfortable in their own skin regardless of how their hair texture may be, and to stop

judging others with such shallow perspectives.

Thank you for considering me and my little one’s “Tresume`”. – Queesha

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